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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/23517631">i just gotta know what you and i would feel like</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/spacejames/pseuds/spacejames'>spacejames</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, New Dangan Ronpa V3: Everyone's New Semester of Killing</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Hope’s Peak Academy AU, Hurt/Comfort, Multi, Non-Despair AU, Pining, Romance, UST, so much pining</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-04-06</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-04-06</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-01 13:49:12</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>6,039</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/23517631</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/spacejames/pseuds/spacejames</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>He hadn’t realized just how much <i>work</i> fake dating Kaito Momota would be.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Akamatsu Kaede/Harukawa Maki (background), Momota Kaito/Saihara Shuichi</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>17</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>69</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>i just gotta know what you and i would feel like</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>aahhh hello and welcome to the saimota fake dating au nobody asked for!! this is a project that i’ll hopefully be working on for quite some time, as i have nearly the whole thing planned out already. i have every intention to finish this!</p><p>i don’t have a set update schedule, but i’ll try to post once a week. that’s a tentative schedule, so we’ll see if it actually works or not :’)</p><p>i hope you enjoy!</p><p>(title is from “bad ideas” by tessa violet)</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The usual soft chatter of the dining hall doesn’t reach Saihara’s ears. It’s easy to tune out the sound of his classmates around him, their voices rising and falling, silverware clinking against their plates and bowls; he’s had enough practice doing so, and it allows him to pay full attention to the scene unfolding across the table.</p><p>Akamatsu and Harukawa are sitting side-by-side, which is typical, but that’s where anything <em> normal </em>about this situation ends. For one thing, they’re much closer than usual, their shoulders nearly brushing as they eat, heads tucked close as they murmur to each other on occasion. </p><p>For another, they’re holding hands. </p><p>“Mornin’, Shuichi,” a voice says, cutting through his focus like a knife. Saihara blinks, the sounds of the dining hall filtering into his consciousness once more. </p><p>He looks up to see Momota sliding into the seat beside him, setting down his breakfast plate. “Hello, Momota-kun,” Saihara says, glancing back toward Akamatsu and Harukawa. The two girls haven’t moved, and really, they’re not calling any attention to themselves, but he can’t help it. “Um… since when were they a thing?” he questions mildly. </p><p>Momota follows his gaze. “Oh, that,” he says, and there’s a forced levity to his tone as he stabs an apple slice a bit too aggressively with his fork. “Since yesterday, I think. But it wasn’t hard to see coming.”</p><p>“I didn’t realize,” Saihara says, and pauses. He steals a glance at Momota. </p><p>Oblivious to his gaze, Momota takes a bite of his apple slice. “Didn’t realize what?”</p><p>He might as well just say it, he thinks. “That Harukawa-san had moved on.” </p><p>It’s been a little over two months since Momota and Harukawa ended things. They’d been together for the better part of a year, splitting up in an abrupt but amicable manner right at the beginning of summer break. Despite the circumstances—and despite Momota’s carefree attitude and refusal to talk about anything emotional—Saihara knows his best friend, and he knows that contrary to what he says, it’s taken Momota this long to even start to get over his feelings for Harukawa. And while it was clear from the start that she didn’t hold the same lingering feelings as he did, it’s still a surprise to see her already involved with someone new. </p><p>That someone being Akamatsu is just an added surprise—and an added weight on Saihara’s heart.</p><p>Across the table, Harukawa smiles at Akamatsu, her red eyes warm. Saihara watches out of the corner of his eye as Momota’s jaw clenches. </p><p>“Yeah, well,” Momota says lightly, and Saihara doesn’t comment on the fact that they’ve both been sitting there, staring in silence, for longer than is appropriate. “I don’t really care that much—” an obvious lie “—but it’s gotta be weird for you, right?”</p><p>Saihara flinches, but only slightly, and looks down at the coffee mug cradled between his fingers. Another touchy subject: his year-long crush on Akamatsu, finally in the last stages of dissipating after zero reciprocation, and still a little raw. </p><p>But Momota is right. “It is a little weird,” Saihara confesses. </p><p>Thoughtfully, Momota chews another apple slice, his lilac eyes going a little unfocused. He doesn’t respond, so they fall into a comfortable silence, Saihara sipping his coffee while Momota continues to attack his breakfast. It’s peaceful, even with the chattering around them, and Saihara is grateful for that.</p><p>“Hey,” Momota says, once Saihara’s cup is halfway drained. He turns, his expression lighting up in a way that means only one thing. “Hey, Shuichi, hey—”</p><p>Saihara takes another sip. “Yeah?” he responds, hiding his slight smile.</p><p>“I have an idea,” Momota announces, and yep, there it is. He stands, picking up his empty plate, and beckons for Saihara to join him. “C’mon, we still have a little time before class starts.”</p><p>Curiosity piqued, Saihara rises, quickly downing another few mouthfuls of coffee. The caffeine is hitting his system, and he’s finally beginning to feel a little more aware, his brain functioning at its normal speed rather than the sluggish morning pace his friends like to tease him for. “Where are we going?” he asks, following Momota to clean up their dishes.</p><p>“Just somewhere we can be alone.” Momota’s eyes are glowing as he tosses a grin back over his shoulder at Saihara. “I don’t want anyone overhearing us.”</p><p>“What is this about?” Saihara questions, bemused now.</p><p>Momota leads him out of the dining hall, and Saihara hurries to keep up with him, falling in a few steps behind him. He leads him down the hallway, glancing around surreptitiously like he expects them to be followed, but there’s nobody around; everyone from their class is in the dining room, so the halls of the school are empty.</p><p>Once they reach the stairs, Momota halts, turning to Saihara with that bright look still on his face. “So,” he begins, “You may not have been able to guess this, but I’m actually a little annoyed that Harumaki got into another relationship. But it’s not because I still have feelings for her!” he adds quickly, noting the way Saihara begins to frown. “I’m more annoyed that she’s winning, because that means I’m losing!”</p><p>Saihara looks at him blankly. “Losing… what?”</p><p>“The breakup!” Momota slams his fists together, a determined look crossing his face. “I can’t let Harumaki win so easily!”</p><p>“Um, Momota-kun…” Saihara is halfway between amused and perplexed, which is a common thing to be feeling around Momota. “I don’t really think that’s how breakups work…” </p><p>Predictably, Momota ignores his half-hearted protest and barrels on. “So, in order to win at this breakup and beat Harumaki, I just have to get into a relationship myself, and prove that I’ve moved on! It’s basically foolproof. What d’you think?” He looks triumphant as he waits expectantly for Saihara’s response.</p><p>There’s a pause as Saihara mulls this over, a little taken aback. Contrary to Momota’s apparent belief, this plan sounds… terrible, to put it mildly. There’s very little chance that Momota will actually be able to pull this off—if he even gets past the mountain of issues that would arise before he’d even be able to get started. But Saihara knows that once Momota has his mind set on something, there’s no convincing him to change it. His stubbornness, while sometimes admirable, can be nothing short of infuriating at times. </p><p>“Okay,” he says, at last, trying to keep his voice measured.<em> Don’t argue, just identify the weak spots. </em>“I think I understand. But… how are you going to find someone to date so quickly? It’s not like you can just suddenly begin a relationship with someone…”</p><p>At that, Momota actually looks sheepish, which is… disconcerting, to say the least. “Ah,” he says, rubbing the back of his neck. “Well, see, that’s why I’m telling you! I want you to do it.”</p><p>A beat of shocked silence, in which Saihara gapes at him blankly. </p><p>“Wh-<em> what?! </em>” </p><p>“Yeah!” A grin spreads across Momota’s face. “You should be my boyfriend, Shuichi.”</p><p>Saihara’s face feels hot. He avoids Momota’s gaze as he tries to pick up the pieces of his argument, his heart stuttering wildly. “Wh-why me?” he stammers out, hiding his blush under the brim of his hat. “I mean, I’m not exactly… the type of person you’d be into, Momota-kun.”</p><p>“Nah, you’re totally my type!” Momota says cheerfully, and Saihara wheezes a little, because does Momota <em> know </em> the effect his words are having on him? He can’t just <em> say </em>things like that. “I think it’s believable. We’re already close, what with you being my sidekick and all, so why would it be a stretch for us to start dating? Of course, we don’t have to actually date—just make it seem like we are, so Harumaki will see that I’ve moved on.” He seems pleased with himself, like he’s figured it all out.</p><p>“Hold on,” Saihara says, and rubs a hand over his face. Maybe he’s still dreaming, he thinks. “So you want me to… what, be your fake boyfriend? To make Harukawa-san jealous?” His heart sinks a little at that thought, though he isn’t quite sure why. </p><p>Momota doesn’t seem to notice Saihara’s conflicting feelings. “Not jealous, exactly,” he says. “I don’t want her back or anything. I just need to prove that I’m doing better than her at getting over it!”</p><p>This conversation has been an emotional rollercoaster. Saihara takes a deep breath, considering. “How long would this be going on?” he asks, hesitant. “I mean, would it be indefinite? How would we maintain a fake relationship for that long? Or would we have to stage a breakup?”</p><p>A frown settles on Momota’s face, his lips pressing into a thoughtful line. “That’s a good question,” he muses.</p><p>Saihara’s stomach drops. “You didn’t even think about that?!”</p><p>“Hey, I can only do so much in such a short time, okay?” Momota’s tone takes on a defensive note, but it’s still light-hearted, so Saihara knows he’s not genuinely offended. “How about this? We only have to date until the school festival, and then sometime after that, we’ll just tell everybody we broke up. How does that sound?”</p><p>Another deep breath. It’s the end of September, which means the school-wide cultural festival is in just under six weeks. When Saihara thinks about it, it feels like both a very long time and not a long time at all. Surely by then he can sort through this messy, undefined knot of feelings, the one that’s been slowly building in the pit of his stomach ever since Momota brought this topic up. He can do this favor for his best friend, can’t he?</p><p><em> It’s only a couple weeks, </em>he tells himself, feeling strangely resigned as he takes down each and every one of his own carefully-planned arguments.</p><p>And maybe it’s the eager hope in Momota’s gaze, or maybe it’s the way his chest flutters with anticipation at the idea of it, but Saihara finds himself saying something he couldn’t have anticipated.</p><p>“Okay,” Saihara says. “I’ll do it.”</p><p>Momota lights up like a star, and Saihara’s cheeks feel even warmer when the taller boy slings an arm around his shoulders, pulling him against his side. “Alright! Thanks, Shuichi!” he grins. “You’re the best sidekick ever, y’know that?”</p><p>Around the corner, Saihara hears the creak of a door opening, and Chabashira’s voice spills out of the dining hall. Flustered, he eases away from Momota, automatically lifting a hand to tug down the brim of his hat. “I-I should get to class,” he blurts out. Why is his heart pounding so hard? “I’ll text you later?”</p><p>“Sure.” Momota seems puzzled, but Saihara doesn’t stop to ask why. He hurries away with a quick goodbye, rounding the corner by the stairs and darting into the first place he sees, which happens to be the boys’ bathroom.</p><p>Alone, Saihara braces his hands on the sink, sucking in a breath. Momota’s voice echoes in his head, too soft and warm, too… sincere.<em> You should be my boyfriend, Shuichi.  </em></p><p>With a sinking feeling of dread, Saihara meets his own eyes in the mirror. </p><p>
  <em> What have I gotten myself into? </em>
</p>
<hr/><p>Saihara expects to have at least a little bit of time to process before he has to fully accept that this fake relationship with Momota is his new reality. At the very least, he’s expecting to be able to <em> talk </em>to Momota about things like boundaries, or whether they’re going to tell their families, or even just getting their stories straight, before they tell the rest of their friends.</p><p>He couldn’t be more wrong.</p><p>Akamatsu is the first to breach the subject. It’s not even lunchtime yet; their first class has just ended, and as Saihara is packing up his things, Akamatsu approaches his desk, smiling warmly. “Saihara-kun!” </p><p>“Hello, Akamatsu-san,” Saihara says, and while there’s still a pleasant little flutter in his chest when he sees her, the crush feelings are mostly gone. “What’s up?”</p><p>Clasping her hands together, Akamatsu beams at him. “I wanted to say congratulations!” she exclaims. “I heard that you and Momota-kun are together! It’s so funny, you two got together right about the same time as me and Maki.”</p><p>Saihara’s chest tightens, momentary panic washing over him. “Y-you did? Where did you hear that?” </p><p>“Huh?” Akamatsu’s smile fades a little, a worried little crease forming between her brows. “Well, before class, I heard Momota-kun telling Maki that the two of you are dating… Was that not true?” Her eyes narrow slightly.</p><p>“A-ah, no, it—it’s true!” Saihara stammers quickly, heat rushing to fill his cheeks once more.  “I just, um… I didn’t think Momota-kun was going to be telling people so quickly.”  </p><p>It’s not his best save, despite being the truth, but Akamatsu seems to buy it. She relaxes, lips curling up again. “Oh, okay. Well, it’s about time! You two have been dancing around each other for ages, jeez!” </p><p>Not entirely sure what that means, Saihara frowns as he stands, lifting his bag. He opens his mouth to reply, but before he gets the chance, another voice chimes in. “Wow! Saihara-chan and Momota-chan are dating?” </p><p>Ouma has a habit of appearing, seemingly out of nowhere, anywhere that gossip is happening; it’s an unsettling talent that he only ever uses to his own benefit. Right now, he’s materialized right behind Akamatsu, peeking around her with wide, inquisitive eyes.</p><p>Saihara has to stifle a groan. If Ouma knows, the rest of their class isn’t far behind. <em> So much for keeping things on the down-low. </em>“Yes, we are,” he says. </p><p>“Nishishi!” Ouma chirps, bouncing on his heels. “Akamatsu-chan is right! Everyone’s been waiting and waiting for you and Momota-chan to confess your undying love for each other. I’m <em> sooo </em>surprised you actually had the guts to do it!”</p><p>Despite his childish tone, there’s something sly in the way Ouma smiles at him, almost as though he <em> knows </em> something. Saihara suppresses a shiver, ducking his head and hiding his gaze under the brim of his hat. “U-um, congratulations to you, too, Akamatsu-san,” he says, trying to direct attention away from himself as the three of them step out into the hall together. “You said you and Harukawa-san are together too?”</p><p>Akamatsu turns a shade of pink that Saihara doesn’t think he’s ever seen on her before. “Thank you! I’m really happy,” she gushes, apparently taking the bait. “She’s so cool, isn’t she? I’ve always admired her so much. I can’t believe she wanted to be with me. And she’s so cute!”</p><p>A blank look on his face, Ouma stares at her for a moment. “Well, this is boring,” he says, glancing at Saihara again. “See you later, Akamatsu-chan, Saihara-chan!” With that, he darts away into the quickly-filling hallway, more of their classmates and peers spilling out of their classrooms.</p><p>“I should be getting to my next class, too. I’ll see you at lunch?” Akamatsu gives Saihara a sweet smile. “Congratulations again!”</p><p>“Yeah, see you,” Saihara replies, trying to suppress the guilt churning in his stomach as he watches her go.</p>
<hr/><p>By the time Saihara arrives at the dining hall for lunch, his mind is solely focused on damage control. It’s still possible that Ouma hasn’t made his way to everyone in the class yet—if Saihara is lucky, he might be able to keep Ouma distracted for most of lunch, thereby making sure he won’t tell anyone else about Saihara’s relationship with Momota.</p><p>Unfortunately, the moment he sets foot in the dining room, his hopes are shattered. A few feet away from the door, Iruma and Ouma are blocking Momota’s path, giving the appearance that they’d ambushed him as soon as he walked in. The rest of his classmates are loosely gathered, either sitting or standing at the long table.</p><p>Saihara immediately pulls his hat down over his face, hoping to sneak past them, but he freezes in his tracks when he hears Iruma shout at him.</p><p>“Hey, Shittyhara!” she yells. “Get your ass over here with your boyfriend!”</p><p>Saihara is perfectly aware that trying to resist would be useless. He shuffles obediently over to stand at Momota’s side, briefly glancing up at him and mumbling out a quick, “Hello.”</p><p>To his surprise, Momota doesn’t hesitate to drape his arm over Saihara’s shoulders, all but tucking the smaller boy into his side. “Hey, Shuichi,” he says, his voice pitched low, as though for Saihara’s ears only. “Sorry about all this. I dunno who told them.” His thumb rubs gentle circles into Saihara’s shoulder, the weight of his hand warm even through layers of fabric.</p><p><em> He’s got the act down, </em> Saihara thinks, a little dizzy. “I think <em> you </em>did,” he says.</p><p>Iruma snaps her fingers in front of Saihara’s face, and he starts, jerking back a little. “Hey, lovers! Quit fuckin’ embarrassing yourselves! I have a question!”</p><p>“What is it?” Momota glares at her.</p><p>A cackle escapes her. “Which one of you virgins confessed first? I’d bet money that it wasn’t Shyhara over here!”</p><p>“It definitely wasn’t,” Ouma pipes up. “Saihara-chan would’ve gotten <em> way </em>too flustered, like right now! Look how red his face is! Nishishi!” He dances closer, leaning down to peek up at Saihara from under the brim of his hat. “Aww, Saihara-chan is so embarrassed~!”</p><p>As though trying to protect him, Momota’s arm tightens around Saihara, pulling him even closer, so he’s flush against Momota’s side. The distinctive smell of Momota’s body spray washes over him, and it’s strangely comforting in its familiarity, to the point that Saihara has to fight the urge to turn and bury his face in Momota’s shoulder.</p><p>“Why does anyone care about Saihara-san and Momota-san?” complains Chabashira from over by the table. “At least the degenerate males are sticking to their own kind! Akamatsu-san and Harukawa-san are dating, too! Why is no one talking about <em> them </em>?”</p><p>“‘Cause they know Harumaki would kill them if they made a big deal out of it,” Momota mumbles, and Saihara covers his mouth to hide his smile. He’s not wrong—Harukawa’s head whips around the moment she hears Chabashira say her name, her eyes burning darkly as she levels a death glare at the other girl.</p><p>Shirogane sighs, a faraway look in her eyes as she rests her chin on her hand. “Of course, Saihara-kun and Momota-kun perfectly embody the ‘best friends to lovers’ trope,” she muses. “It’s just like a BL manga, isn’t it?” </p><p>“Well, <em> I </em>think it’s sweet!” Akamatsu says decisively, hands on her hips. She stares Iruma and Ouma down, as though daring them to argue. “If Saihara-kun and Momota-kun are happy, that’s what matters, right? I’ll support the two of you no matter what!”</p><p>“Of course!” Yonaga smiles serenely at Saihara and Momota. “Atua has spoken to me. It is because of His divine power that you are together now. You couldn’t possibly hope to escape the will of Atua forever, now, could you?”</p><p>“Oh my <em> god, </em> will you cut it out with that Atua bullshit already?” Iruma snaps. </p><p>Kiibo speaks up next, though he looks a little anxious, gaze darting around the room. “I’m… not entirely sure what’s going on,” he says. “But from what I understand, Momota-kun and Saihara-kun have entered into a romantic relationship, yes? If that’s the case, I’ll support you as well.”</p><p>“Typical Kiibaby,” Ouma snickers. “Of course you wouldn’t understand! Human relationships must be so confusing for a heartless robot like you!”</p><p>Spluttering, Kiibo begins to retort, but Amami interrupts him. “Guys, I think you should tone it down,” he says, giving Ouma a chastising look. </p><p>“Gonta agrees with Akamatsu-san!” Gonta calls out. “Gonta thinks that Momota-kun and Saihara-kun are good for each other. It is good to see friends getting closer!” He looks delighted to see Saihara and Momota standing beside each other, a bright, sunny smile on his face. </p><p>Iruma makes an exaggerated gagging sound. “Fuckin’ losers!”</p><p>The cacophony of voices is starting to overwhelm Saihara, and he finds himself shrinking back even more. Momota notices—it would be hard not to, with the way his arm is wrapped around him, but the fact that he does makes Saihara’s chest still feels a little warmer all the same—and squeezes Saihara’s shoulders gently before lifting his chin and calling out, “Cut it out, guys! So what if me and Shuichi are dating? That’s nobody’s business but ours, so back off!”</p><p>His voice rings out over the chatter, and their classmates quiet a little, some of them wearing guilty expressions as they turn to look at Momota. It’s not completely silent, as a few conversations between people who lost interest carry on in the background—which Saihara is thankful for. If <em> everyone </em>had been silently staring at him, he thinks he might have had to melt into the floor. </p><p>Momota releases him, and Saihara lets out a breath. “Finally,” the taller boy mumbles, shooting an apologetic glance at Sahara. “Thought they’d never shut up…”</p><p>Relieved, Saihara follows Momota as he heads toward the kitchen. “Thank you,” he says quietly as he catches up, the blush finally starting to fade from his cheeks. </p><p>“Don’t mention it. They were annoying me, too.” Momota shrugs it off, but the smile he gives Saihara is warm. “Ouma and Iruma’ll lose interest eventually. I’d bet they’ll have someone else to make fun of by tomorrow.”</p><p>Saihara bites back a smile, comforted by Momota’s words. Maybe this won’t be so terrible, after all.</p>
<hr/><p>
  <em> — Momota-kun, can we meet up after school? i think we need to discuss some details </em>
</p><p>
  <em> — Hey Shuichi! :) Sure  </em>
</p><p>
  <em> — Where do you want to meet? </em>
</p><p>
  <em> — what about my research lab? i don’t think we’d be overheard there </em>
</p><p>
  <em> — Alright! Sounds good! :thumbs_up: </em>
</p><p>
  <em> — i’ll see you then </em>
</p><p>
  <em> — See ya, sidekick!! :) :) </em>
</p>
<hr/><p>Perched on one of the loveseats in his research lab, Saihara drums his fingers against his knee and waits for Momota to show up. The fireplace is burning low, the flames a deep reddish-orange glow as they lap against the logs; he finds that it’s easy to get lost by staring into the fire, his mind wandering. Normally, he’d be relaxed, feeling the warmth from the fire on his cheeks and unwinding for the day before either working on cases or doing homework. Today, however, he’s exhausted, and it’s all he can do not to doze off while he waits for Momota.</p><p>Momota. Saihara sighs, leaning back against the loveseat. <em> What possessed me to agree to this idea? </em>It’s not like him to get caught up in Momota’s harebrained schemes—on the contrary, Saihara is usually the voice of reason, the one to talk Momota down from whatever crazy, impulsive thing he’s decided to do that day. But this time, he’s been swept up in it, dragged along for the ride, and he’s already starting to get the feeling that he’s in this for the long haul.</p><p>A soft knock at the door catches his attention, and Saihara sits up straighter. “Come in,” he calls, and Momota steps through the door, smile as star-bright as ever. </p><p>“Hey, Shuichi!” he greets him, coming to sit beside Saihara without a second thought. “So, what did you want to talk to me about?”</p><p>Saihara shifts, turning toward Momota. “Ah, um, there are just a few details I think we need to go over,” he says. “Things like public displays of affection, flirting, our backstory… We need to have our stories straight if this is going to work properly. For example, what level of physical contact are we both okay with, and what’s off the table?”</p><p>“Good question! Yeah, those are things we gotta think about.” Momota hums, his brow furrowing as he thinks. “I’m pretty much fine with anything, as long as it’s not too over-the-top! Holding hands and hugging—stuff like that’s okay, but I dunno about being all over each other, you know?”</p><p>“I agree,” Saihara says. Then something else occurs to him, and he very nearly chokes on air, but he knows he has to ask. “What about, um…” He blushes, unable to meet Momota’s eyes. “… k-kissing?”</p><p>Momota’s eyes widen slightly, his face reddening to match Saihara’s. “Kissing?” He clears his throat, then lets out a short chuckle, rubbing the back of his neck. “Uh, I don’t really think that’ll be an issue, do you?”</p><p>Shaking his head, Saihara says, “Ah, I doubt it’ll even come up,” and his face is burning hotter than the dying embers in the fireplace, and <em> why did he even bring this up? </em>“U-um, moving on! What about flirting?”</p><p>“Like, making flirty comments and pet names and shit? I’d say it’s the same as the PDA stuff. We gotta make it seem realistic,” Momota says. “But we don’t wanna rub it in people’s faces.” </p><p>“Right…” Saihara can’t deny that he’s a little concerned about what ‘realistic flirting’ looks like from Momota’s perspective, but he guesses he’ll find out sooner or later. He bites his lip, thinking. “What about our families?”</p><p>Momota stiffens. It’s almost imperceptible, but Saihara notices it anyway. “What about them?”</p><p>“Do you think we should tell them?” Come to think of it, Saihara’s not entirely sure that Momota’s grandparents even know that their grandson is bisexual. Saihara’s aunt and uncle are supportive, but he knows not everyone else is so lucky.</p><p>There’s a tightness in the set of Momota’s shoulders, in the way he presses his lips into a thin line and won’t meet Saihara’s gaze. “There’s not really any point,” he says. “They don’t gotta know, do they? I mean, all of this is for the sake of our classmates. Family’s got nothing to do with it.”</p><p>“Ah, yeah.” Saihara wonders if he should apologize, but Momota looks so uncomfortable that he figures he should just drop it. Clearly, he’s touched on a sore spot. “W-well, those are all the questions I had, except for our backstory.”</p><p>Momota shrugs, still tense. “I asked you out, and you said yes? Do we need any more details than that?”</p><p>“Maybe,” Saihara says. “I get the feeling that our friends won’t be satisfied with such a simple answer for long, though.”</p><p>A smile tugs at Momota’s lips, and he relaxes, leaning back and draping his arm over the back of the loveseat. It doesn’t quite touch Saihara’s shoulders, a ghost of a sensation, and he tries not to lean into it. “Well, I’m sure we’ll come up with something! I’ll think of the best, most romantic relationship origin story ever, just for us!” </p><p>Saihara laughs. “I’m looking forward to hearing it,” he says. When he’s with Momota, it’s easier to forget how crazy this whole thing seems; Momota’s presence calms his nerves, comforts him, in a way that he can’t exactly describe. </p><p>“Alright!” Momota hops to his feet, and his hand brushes against Saihara’s shoulder for a moment as he does, but he doesn’t seem to notice, so Saihara ignores the faint prickle of warmth that radiates from the spot where Momota had touched him and says nothing. “Well, I need to get home soon. My grandparents usually want me to help them around the house after school, and they don’t like it when I’m late. Plus, I need to work on my homework!”</p><p>“Since when do you voluntarily do homework, Momota-kun?” It’s not that Momota is stupid; contrary to popular belief, he’s actually incredibly smart, but he tends to get distracted easily when he’s trying to do homework. That, or he forgets about it entirely.</p><p>Momota’s eyes brighten. “Well, there’s this week-long astronaut training in another city in a couple weeks, and I gotta make sure my grades stay up so I can pass the exam and get in!” He slams his fists together, resolute. “Alright! I’m gonna do my absolute best! See you later, Shuichi!” </p><p>“Good luck, Momota-kun!” The glow in Saihara’s heart doesn’t fade, even after Momota has left the room. Spirits high, he gets up from the loveseat and moves to the desk, spreading his files and notebooks across the glossy wooden surface and settling in to work. Whatever the situation may be, Momota always seems to have a way to make him feel better, just by being himself.</p>
<hr/><p>The next day, Momota’s prediction is proved to be mostly correct—Ouma whistles at them and Iruma shouts something crude when they walk into the dining room together for breakfast, but none of their other friends harass them too terribly. Saihara has a hard time not drifting during breakfast, eyelids heavy from another night of staying up too late working on his uncle’s old cases, but after two cups of the cafeteria’s ungodly strong coffee, he’s feeling more alert. </p><p>It’s a good thing, too, because Ouma approaches him before class, all but cornering him in the now-empty dining hall. “Hey, Saihara-chan,” he says, deceptively cheerful. “I wanna ask you something.”</p><p>Saihara eyes him a little warily. “What is it, Ouma-kun?”</p><p>“Well, it’s less of a question, and more of an… accusation.” Ouma’s smile turns sly. “I know you and Momota-chan are faking your relationship.”</p><p>A chill runs down Saihara’s spine. He tries to keep his expression neutral so as not to give anything away, but there’s a faint tremor in his voice when he says, “What are you talking about?”</p><p>“Nishishishi~ Don’t try to out-lie a liar, Saihara-chan. It won’t end well for you.” Ouma folds his hands behind the back of his head, appearing nonchalant. It’s a stark contrast to the way Saihara’s heart is pounding hard in his chest, palms collecting sweat. “Did you really think you could trick me?”</p><p>“Ah, I-I didn’t…” Saihara tries to swallow, but his mouth is dry. “Why would we be faking it?”</p><p>Still grinning, Ouma rocks back and forth on the balls of his feet. “Maybe to make Harukawa-chan jealous? If that’s the reason, that would be pretty stupid!” He giggles, either unaware of or unconcerned with the fact that Saihara is panicking.</p><p>Saihara clears his throat, trying to compose himself. “It’s nothing like that, Ouma-kun. Momota-kun and I aren’t lying.”</p><p>“Is that so?” Ouma looks unconvinced. “Well, don’t worry, Saihara-chan. I won’t tell any of our friends that you’re lying to their faces. This can be our little secret, okay~? See you in class!” With a little wave of his fingers, he’s gone, disappearing through the set of heavy double doors that lead out into the hallway.</p><p>Shakily, Saihara lets out the breath he’d been holding. The guilt he’d tried hard to suppress is now an insistent weight on his back, anxiety twisting his stomach into a hard knot. Not for the first time, Saihara wonders if this is really a good idea. Ouma’s right; he and Momota are lying to their friends, their classmates, by keeping up this charade. Doubt worms its way into his mind. Maybe he should call it off.</p><p>But then he remembers the look on Momota’s face when Saihara had agreed, the way he’d lit up with excitement, and he can’t bring himself to even really consider the option. Despite his decision, though, the doubt stays, lingering in the back of his mind all day.</p>
<hr/><p>“Saihara-kun! Momota-kun!” Akamatsu’s hand is linked with Harukawa’s as she hurries over to them. Being in a relationship suits the pianist—anytime she’s with her girlfriend, Akamatsu is practically glowing, and now is no exception. She’s practically floating on air as she walks. For Harukawa’s part, her expression doesn’t change much, but there’s a softness in her gaze whenever she looks at Akamatsu, and for Harukawa, that kind of look speaks volumes.</p><p>Abruptly, Momota reaches down and grabs Saihara’s hand. Saihara’s breath catches in his throat at the sudden contact, warmth tingling up the length of his arm as Momota entangles their fingers and says, entirely too casually given how flustered Saihara feels, “Oh, hey, Akamatsu! Hey, Harumaki!”</p><p>Harukawa glowers a little, but she stopped trying to get Momota to drop the nickname a long time ago. Even their breakup couldn’t get Momota to shake the habit, and though she still glares at him whenever it comes up, there’s clearly very little lingering awkwardness between the two.</p><p>Which must be why Akamatsu feels comfortable enough to say what she does next. “So, are the two of you free next weekend? Because Maki and I have two extra tickets to the movies, and we thought—” Harukawa snorts, the sound barely audible, but Akamatsu continues, oblivious “—maybe you guys would want to come with? Like a double date!”</p><p>“Next weekend?” Momota rubs his chin with his free hand, considering. “I should be free. What about you, Shuichi?” </p><p>A double date with Harukawa and Akamatsu? Saihara purses his lips. This could either go well, or horribly wrong. “I’m free, too,” he says, and is rewarded with Momota squeezing his hand. He swallows hard and adds, “It sounds fun, Akamatsu-san.”</p><p>“Great!” Akamatsu beams. “I’ll text you guys the details!” </p><p>“Okay,” Saihara says, a little distracted by the way Momota’s thumb has begun to rub back and forth over his knuckles. His hand is very, very warm. </p><p>Akamatsu leaves with a smile, taking Harukawa with her across the courtyard to where Toujo and Chabashira are sitting beneath a tree. Once they’re gone, Momota releases his hand, and Saihara isn’t sure if he’s relieved or disappointed. </p><p>By the end of the week, Saihara is feeling… drained. He hasn’t gotten to spend any alone time with Momota, which means every time they’ve seen each other, every interaction has been colored by the pretense of a relationship. And for the most part, on the outside, nothing is different—but their dynamic has changed, and Saihara is conscious of it every moment they spend together. This show they’re putting on is occupying his mind to a worrying extent. He can’t help noticing every touch, every word, wondering how it would look to an outsider, whether their act is believable or not. </p><p>He hadn’t realized just how much <em> work </em>fake dating Kaito Momota would be.</p><p>
  <em> Still more than five weeks to go.  </em>
</p><p>So when classes let out on Friday, Saihara is relieved. His uncle always works late on Friday nights, and his aunt will be tired after a long week, so Saihara will be able to curl up in his room and spend the evening recharging. </p><p>What he’s not expecting is to be all but <em> tackled </em>by Momota on his way out of the school. Saihara yelps as a pair of strong arms wrap around him, very nearly lifting the smaller boy off of his feet with the force of the embrace. The only reason he even knows it’s Momota is because of the smell—no one else at this school would use AXE body spray quite so liberally. </p><p>“Ah, M-Momota-kun?” he stutters, his voice muffled by Momota’s shoulder. Hesitant, he lifts his hands and places them on Momota’s back, loosely returning the hug. He doesn’t need to be able to see around Momota to know that people are staring; they’re standing on the front steps of the academy, right after school has ended, and their classmates are <em> everywhere. </em>Not just their class, either—Saihara is positive that he saw a few upperclassmen milling around the courtyard, too. </p><p>Momota tucks his face against Saihara’s neck, and Saihara stops breathing altogether, because Momota’s breath against his throat is incredibly warm, and a tingle goes down Saihara’s spine, goosebumps prickling over every inch of his skin. “Sorry,” Momota exhales, and Saihara’s fingers twitch, reflexively curling into the fabric of his jacket. “I won’t be able to see you this weekend. I figured I should say goodbye like this.”</p><p>“It’s a bit dramatic,” Saihara murmurs, but it comes out sounding less exasperated and more fond than anything. </p><p>Another moment passes before Momota straightens, takes a step back and lets his arms fall to the side. Just like that, the embrace is over, and Saihara feels a little cold at the sudden lack of Momota’s body heat. “See you next week, Shuichi,” he says, and even though the affectionate smile he wears is for the benefit of their audience, Saihara feels the warmth of it all the way down to his toes. </p><p>“Have a good weekend, Momota-kun,” he says, and as he watches Momota leave, he can’t help but think that he might already be in too deep.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>feedback is always appreciated!</p><p>you can reach me on tumblr at <a href="https://space-james.tumblr.com/">space-james</a>! i’m also running this year’s saimota week in may, so check out the prompt list over at <a href="https://saimotaweek.tumblr.com/">saimotaweek</a> on tumblr or @saimotaweek2020 on twitter!</p></blockquote></div></div>
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